30.09.09

'It's my birthday in three days time' she said,

bouncing up and down excitedly with a wide tooth-gapped grin.

Her mother smiled benignly on.

A serene image of motherhood.

Her beautiful lilting French accent making my native English language sound melodic.

I must finish the hearts and wrap them for tomorrow -

for when you are 5 turning 6,

presents have to be unwrapped on your birthday.

29.09.09

Purring contentedly, she sits posing next to my feet.

Which are sore.

They are the only ones I have - so I can't put on a new pair.....although that would be the ideal solution.

So instead, I take them to a podiatrist to have it confirmed that yes - they are sore.........................

'Take two cushioned heel pads and see me in the morning'

 - or words similar to that.

Hey ho.

28.09.09

A quiet weekend with my three. Saturday and Sunday slid by in a sleepy haze when suddenly we were hit by Monday.....................

Back to reality.

I reached for my stash and started to craft.

The delicious feeling of creating is addictive.

I find it hard to break off and go to work.

25.09.09

Plates piled high,

mugs balanced precariously,

dishes and bowls stacked in coloured towers.

Walking through this space is a delight yet fraught with the fearful anticipation of knocking into one of these fragile stacks.

24.09.09

There is something satisfying about collecting eggs from the hens at the bottom of the garden.

23.09.09

The smell of gentle seasonal decay.

The garden is quiet - the summer rush to flower and seed has tailed off.

Insects and spiders move among the plants and remaining flowers.

22.09.09

They share the unfinished heritage blankie whilst watching a DVD. She purrs as he strokes her back. She is 20 years old and he is 11 and off school sick.

It is raining and cold outside - a good day to be curled up under a blanket :)

21.09.09

After the last two soft-sunshine filled days,

today is cooler and grey.

The boys are back at school and he is at work.

The house is mine.

The old lady is cold and sitting meowing at the wood burning stove, so I have lit it for her. Now purring, she lies melted and satisfied as only an elderly much-loved cat can do.

20.09.09

Still in a daze from a wonderful celebration of our love and life together, we sat outside in the sun; nursing a coffee and watching without seeing the world go by. When I noticed something land silently on his shoulder.

A closer look revealed a minute feather.

We were in awe of something so perfect and complete.

19.09.09

A brief break from chopping, dicing and slicing, we came out to sit in the morning sun with a welcome mug of tea. My boys lay on ground like cats soaking in the warmth of autumn sunshine.

I heard the village church bells ring marking 11am - and there waiting for me was a shadow playing on stone.

Tea finished, picture taken - we three returned to the kitchen to finish our preparations for tonight's celebrations.

18.09.09

A scream then a strangled squeal made me leap up from my computer to see what was happening.

There she was, pale and pointing frantically towards a small desk. 'Spider!' she managed to gasp as she retreated to the furthest wall.

Grinning, I pulled out the desk and started to hunt.

'It's a HUGE spider' she gasped again, her eyes wide and alarmed.

There it was. Quietly standing its ground.

I trapped it under a glass.

'Don't come near me.....don't come near me!' I was told as I triumphantly lifted up the now contained spider.

I stared at its long slender legs covered in hairs and marvelled at the markings on its back. I could see its eyes staring back at me.

It's strange that something as delicately made as this can reduce an adult to a terrified child......................

17.09.09

Tiny hairs bristle.

The flowers of the borage attract bees all summer long to the small kitchen garden behind our house.

16.09.09

I woke up this morning to a dozen red roses.

I barely had time to appreciate them before taking boys to school and going to work.

Now I can drink in their beauty and what they represent and who gave them to me. Thank you xx

When I came out from work - Autumn had left me jewelled reminders of her arrival.

15.09.09

I had this plan.

You see - I would have it finished in time for Saturday. Now I am not so sure. But then, this is how I am. Shrug..........

14.09.09

14.09.09

“It will be your heritage blankie” she said in her gentle Orcadian accent as I paid a few pennies for a bag of recycled wool. I had just expressed my surprise at how little she was asking for the yarn but was delighted at its impending addition to my blanket.

A little piece of the Orkney, a small space in time, a wet and wild holiday now weaves memories through my ‘heritage blankie’.

I can still hear her voice now. I am glad.

13.09.09

Today I missed my self imposed 11am deadline – but I think it was worth it.

12.09.09

For breakfast we ate blackberry and apple jam on pancakes.

The boys jokingly called it ratberry jam.

Last weekend we'd spent a happy afternoon collecting the berries.

Autumn – it gives me mixed feelings. Sad yet hopeful. It is the end of the year it is the beginning of the year.

11.09.09

11.09.09

Twenty years. 20 years.

“One life time with you is not enough. “

That’s what he said to me a few years back, it made me cry then and even now, when I press play back in my memory, I feel a lurching twinge of unconditional love for him.

10.09.09

Autumn is in the air.

Clear blue skies at last – where were they this summer?

At work but no work to do. It’s very quiet today, so we busied ourselves by making an information poster for people who won’t read it.

Life’s like that you know……

09.09.09

Today the sun is shining – so is my mood. The last few days have been a whirl of emotions. My eldest son has started senior school and the strength of his reluctance to enter the world of 'growing-upness' has pained me to tears.

His pale face on the third day as he fought back tears of fear and my having to let him go – on his own – nearly broke my heart.

But today he was happier and so am I.

11 am

11am

I am going to try and mark the first year of senior school of my eldest son, by taking a photograph as near to 11am every day and logging a thought or a feeling or the moment with that photo.

Why 11am? – Well my son is 11.

I work most afternoons and evenings during the week and 11am is as good as any to have a moment to spare for a time of reflection with a mug of tea and my camera.

If along the way you find my wanderings feel free to read and reflect on things happening in your day.

enjoy....

At the end of the year, I will have hopefully achieved my aim and I will present this to him with my love.